How to Break Awkward Silences?

Last post, we talked about 2 different silences, the comfortable silence and the awkward silence. Obviously if you have the comfortable silence, then it's good. But, if you have the awkward silence, it's like having a time bomb sitting next to you. That if you don't diffuse it fast enough, it will go BOOM!! Today's post will explain how to diffuse that time bomb A.K.A the awkward silence

Don't Try Too Hard

What does this mean is that, if you are stuck with the topic or you can't think of any other topic, then don't try too hard to create another topic. Scientifically, if you think too hard, your brain will not be able to think properly. Have you ever relaxed in your room or when you take a shower? If you had, I'm sure that you notice that you will start to get a lot of ideas.. You will start to get ideas that normally you won't think about. So the next time you are having conversation, remember to relax and don't try too hard.. Your brain soon will get a new topic conversation for you to start.

Ask Open Ended Question

Open Ended questions are the way to start a conversation going on. It is good because she can't just simply answer it with a "yes" or "no". One good example of open ended question is "Tell me something special about yourself". It's simple and light. It does not need a bachelor degree to answer and generally people like to talk about them self. So, it's like killing two birds with a stone. You don't get the awkward silence and she will think of you as a good conversationalist.

Make Her Participate
If you ever see a public speaker speaking, they always do something that make the audiences to respond. Such as "Who would like to volunteer to come over here?". It makes the audiences feel that they are participating in the event and it kills the boredom of just listening into the speaker. Now obviously you can't say "Who would like to volunteer?" to her.
If you do, then .... no comments. Instead you can do like this

You : So you see, on my way here, I saw this bitch fighting over a dude.
Now instead you keep on blabbering how they fight, you can ask her to participate by
You : What do you think of those bitch?

She will be more than happy to answer your questions. And it add value to the conversation

Utilize Her Answer
When a woman talk about something, they always give informations within her sentence. And you can use this information to create another conversation that you can use. 

Example

Her : You know, I really like to eat a beef steak in Tony Roma's
There are a few points that you can use to your advantage over here. "Eat", "Beef", "Steak", "Tony Roma's".

You : Okay, high five. We should go to eat a beef steak sometimes this week. 
Her : Oh okay, but I'm not free this weekend though
You : Let me guess, you are going to study this weekend
Her : No, I'll dye my hair this weekend
You : But your hair right now is really nice (flirt)
Her : No, I would like my hair color to be red
You : Why do you like red? or You like red don't you?
Her : Red is bla bla bla

You see, from beef steak, it actually can lead to another conversation's topic. This is because women always hid a piece of information within her sentences. Therefore, it is your job to pull this informations away from the sentences and use it to your advantage. She will be really happy if you are able to notice the small things that you notice about her.

Silences

You are talking to this person that you like. You both enjoy it, but you ran out of things to say. Familiar with that? And there was this "silence" going on. You panicked and screwed things up.

So I'm here to help you break this silence. But before that, I wanna tell you that there are 2 types of silence.
Comfortable silence and Awkward silence.

Comfortable silence
This is they type of silence that you actually want it. The silence of passion. If you watched romantic movies, where the actor and actress are going for the kiss, they had this silence before they kiss. It is a type of silence that actually shows that you are comfortable with the silences. And by being comfortable with the silences, it actually build a sexual tension. Sexual tension is some force of nature that make your heart beats really fast because you know you are going somewhere with the girl. It's really hard to explain by words but if you watch some romantic movies, you should be able to feel the tension that the actor and actress have before they are going for the kiss.

Awkward silence
On the other hand, there is this "Awkward" silence. This is the silence that will FUCKED your time with her. You are talking to this girl, the conversations getting nowhere. You tried to think as many conversations topics as you can, you blurted out the wrong things, and this silence came.

Example,
Guy : Uhhh so how was your day?
Girl : Yeah it was good, I was bla bla bla (While the guy is thinking about another conversation topic)
Guy : Ohhh cool, cool. So let's eat. What do you like for dinner?
Girl : Up to you hahaha (While the guy is thinking about another conversation topic)
Guy : Up to you too hahahaha. Oh that is a good store you wanna come inside?
Girl : No it's not that good
Guy : Yeah true, true, it was not that good.

And the conversations here is not getting anywhere and the dreaded silence came. You ran out of things to say and she doesn't feel comfortable.

Girl : Let's go home, I'm tired
Guy : Yeah sure sure. T_T

The conversation above showed that the girl is actually not comfortable with the guy. And she said "let's go home" but subconsciously she is saying "This is Awkward". And by agreeing with what the girl said, the guy subconsciously saying "Yesss, this is Awkward"

Why Am I Single?!

This is the topic that inspired to me by a lot of people from a lot of forums. I saw that some of them posted a question like "Why Am I Single?". And thus I'm inspired to make this topic in order to clears their doubt.

So the case is "I have money, I have a good body, I'm smart in my class, and every other positive things.... BUT why I'm single?"... And to answer that question, it comes down to your inner personality.

Not Being Comfortable
I do have a friend, he is quite handsome and tall. He is fashionable but the thing is, he is SINGLE. I wondered why. And to my surprise, he is actually has a low self esteem. He doesn't have confidence in himself, and the worst part is that he is insecure. He used to think "Damn, my hair is a mess, what if a girl see me in this condition?", even though his hair was actually fine. And when he talk to a girl, he is too self conscious on what's happening on him. He will tell me later "Fuck, I screwed up... I can see that she doesn't like me" or any other bullshit.

Now what does this tells you? He is not comfortable being himself. He wished that he could be more handsome so that girls will admired him. And when he thought that while talking to a girl, girl can sense it immediately. "This guy is nervous, why?" And this made the girl nervous too and therefore she won't feel comfortable and therefore she is not gonna date you.

Give Away All Your Power
This is the worst and most often mistakes that people did all the time. They want to make their future partner happy, therefore they give away all their power. Confusing?
Example,

Girl said "Hmm I wish I can eat a curry rice..."
Guy said "Ok wait 30 minutes"
And to surprise the girl, the guy will bring a curry rice imported from India and bring it to the front door of her house with extra rose.
Is this a gentleman things to do?
Yes!
Is this good for her impression?
Yes! .... only in Korean Drama!... The real life doesn't work like that.

Do this in real life and she will think of you as creepy and convenience. That is why "nice guy" always stuck at the friendzone because of this very reason. He treats girl like a goddess descend from the heaven. They write poem to them everyday, thinking that the girl's heart will surely melt because of his doing. But in reallity, it's counter productive because the girl will think you are creepy!

This thing will only make her felt convenience to be with you. She doesn't need to do anything to get something from you. Just say the word, and everything will be given to her. The guy doesn't felt like a challange at all...

So to close it, the reasons you are single even though you have wealth, fame, etc is because
1. You are not comfortable with your own skin
2. You give away all your power easily

A good example is actually has been there around you all the time.
Have you ever see a below average faced guy dating a Hot Tall Woman?

He doesn't get that hot tall woman because he is rich or because he is famous or because he hypnotized the girl. He get it because he is fucking comfortable with his own skin. He doesn't give all his power easily. He makes sure that if the girl did something for him, he can give his power in return.
In case of the above, the guy can actually said "Sure, I'll bring you a curry rice.... only if you make-out with me!"
To said the above word, you have to be comfortable with yourself first. And it let the girl know that she has to do something for you first in order to get your power.