Have Fun!

A lot of people forget the most important things in life. They all go out just for the sole purpose of picking up girl. I won't say this is completely wrong, but this method is not effective. 

Why?

Because you put a weight on yourself. You go out with the mindset of picking up girls, getting their number, and so on.

The best way if you want to pick up girls is to have fun!

When you are having fun with yourself, girls can sense that. Therefore she will be more attracted to you. 

I have tried go out just for the sake of picking up girls, and the result wasn't really good. Especially if I didn't get any numbers, I will start beating myself out. Eventually as the day coming to an end, my morales would go down even lower, resulting in no numbers at all.

On the other hand, If you go out to have fun with your friends, or making fun of everything, you will have a different feeling inside you. You will feel happy and confidence. Therefore, when you see a hot girl you want to talk, you can just approach her immediately. When you are having fun with yourself, girls can sense that. Therefore she will be more attracted to you. 
Sure you might get a little bit nervous, but I've told the baby steps on how to not get nervous. http://orangepua.blogspot.com/2013/03/stop-being-nervous.html

Anyway here's something that I did to have fun when I go out with friends

1. Compliment Others
As simple as it sounds. You go out, and when you see something that catches your eyes, compliment it.
For example, you see a dude with colorful Mohawk rocket hair or whatever it is. Go out to him and just says "Dude, your hair is awesome!". It helps you to get over your Approach Anxiety and at the same time get happy with yourself.
When you make others people happy, you yourself will felt happy as well. And it's not a bad thing to make someone's day.


2. Make Yourself Awkward
This is a good thing to get over Approach Anxiety and to have fun. Simple, just make yourself looks awkward in front of other people. You can do push up in the middle of the Mall or whatever things that will makes yourself look awkward. It's good especially if you have your friends tagging along. You guys will have fun and you won't give a shit anymore about what others think of you

3. Prank
This is my favourite. Basically, just go out to prank other people. My favourite is what Sasha told us. Go to the grocery store and buy something. And in the end just said "I don't have money!".
Or go to the boutique and says "How much is that? that? that?". And in the end just says "I don't have money!"
There are a lot of things you can do. You will enjoy the excitement and this will boost your confidence. 
Trust me!

Know Your Personality

Hey guys, today I'm gonna talk to you about Personality. This topic actually should come first as a foundation for your inner personality. Why? Because by knowing your personality you will know how to handle yourself. You yourself should know what are your strengths and your weakness and work on this...

In terms of Skyrim, it's like you have a talent to assassinate using a bow. Instead of doing "Arrow to the Knee" which sounds not that cool, you wanna do "Axe to the head" because you saw other people using a BAD ASS AXE, you start to copy them in using axe. Now what is gonna happened here? You, as the main character are going to be FUCKED UP-SIDE DOWN... Reason? Simple, you try to do something that is not meant from your specialty.

Now I'm NOT saying you should not try something new. Instead try something new, if it doesn't work, leave it and try something new again. Until you find what suit you best. Still, it is better to knew what you good at from the beginning and work from there. It gives more time for you to improves on what you good at rather than start a "new game" from the beginning.


    

Okay, now on to the main topic

Before that, I strongly suggest that you read a book called "Personality Plus" by Florence Litauer. Here you will learn a LOT of important things about personality. Start from how people perceive things differently, how people react to certain things, and many more. Now for those of you who are lazy to read the book, that's okay because me the nice will tell you the basic of it. In this book, you will find out that humans are unique individuals. They all have different personality. However, out of all those differences, they can actually be put in groups.

 This group divide the 4 personality. They are :
-  Sanguine
-  Choleric
-  Melancholy
-  Phlegmatic
The question is, what the fuck does the personalities mean?


Sanguine

People with Sanguine personality generally are a popular peoples. I'm very sure that all of you ever met this person. They are the one that are popular in the class. Like they are able to make people to like them. Talking is their plus point. They are able to communicate effectively and generally bring a positive energy around. So, if you are a sanguine people, it is really easy for you to actually get a "special person" because people like to be with a person that are humorous and able to gives out positive energy. Common sense yeah

The downside are Sanguine person does not has a stable emotion. They can be crying on the morning, but happy as fuck in the afternoon. They also talk without think. Whatever comes out in their brain, they will blurt it out without knowing if it's even safe to said. Thus some people might be offended by this




Choleric
Choleric people have a leadership spirit within them. They are born as leader and have a strong charisma. One of their special traits is that they are decisive. You won't see a choleric person say "Up to you...". Born leader also means that they are extrovert, which means they are able to express their feeling. Another good things about choleric people, is that they are optimist. Now a man with choleric personality also can be considered easy to find a girlfriend. However, a choleric women might find it hard to find a boyfriend. This is because women like to be lead. And the choleric man just provided this to the woman. 

The downsides are often, choleric people don't have much friends. They thought that friends that are useless are just a hindrance for their goals. Carried it to the extreme, and they will labeled as "bossy"


Melancholy
Now we are going to the bottom of the totem pole in general. Melancholy IS NOT necessary at the bottom of the totem pole. I repeat, MELANCHOLY IS NOT THE BOTTOM OF TOTEM POLE. However it is the society that make this rule that melancholy is at the bottom of the totem pole. Melancholy is generally a person that like to think a lot. They think because they want to achieve a perfection. Which means, everything that they do must be perfect. And if they fail to achieve it, they got depressed. But the good thing is melancholy people usually are very smart and they want to achieve perfection.

One of the reason that they are at the bottom of the totem pole is because they are introvert. Which means that they prefer to work alone. Now this is completely fine. However, society thinks that if you are introvert then you are shy. Which i would say BULLSHIT. Shy by itself is scared of other people judgement. T

Phlegmatic
Similar with Melancholy, phlegmatic often considered as the bottom of the totem pole by society because of the same reason. I would have to say Fuck that again. Phlegmatic is an introverted, and observatory people in general. And again, society thought that this is a shy behavior and place it at the bottom of the pole. That's why I say "FUCK YOU SOCIETY FOR CREATING THIS RULE" The good thing about phlegmatic is that they are calm, easygoing, and able to take pressure. 
Best is some of phlegmatic person is all rounded. So they can have all personality inside them, though it will not be obvious.


Okay above, I have listed the personality type. Which one are yours?
Now if you have found it, DO NOT be embarrassed about it. Instead embrace it proudly...

First, I want to share my experience with all of you. I was born as a phlegmatic person. So what does that means? It means that I am an introverted, silent, and a lazy ass guy. My father is a melancholy and my mother is a choleric. So what happened here is that my mother always force me to be a leader and an extroverted guy. She always say" SPEAK SPEAK SPEAK" because I don't really talk a lot. Continuously, I became to see that every body should be a leader and a good person to talk with. For a long time, I started to behave like a sanguine and a choleric. I try to act funny, which in turn out to be goofy and dumb. I try to act like a leader but in the end, it looks more like a scaredy cat leader.
"Why is this happening" I thought. Am I a FAIL person? I can't be direct and I can't be a funny and fun to be with...
It is because of my REAL INNER personality is a phlegmatic. Phlegmatic have a "dry joke". So if I force myself to be like a sanguine which has a "Good Joke", it will looks really weird. That is why all the girls I've tried to date with from Junior High School reject me. Why? because they can tell that I'm FAKING.

Soon after that, I just realized that I should be myself to the extreme, which I posted it before. I accept my weakness that I'm a silent,lazy, and a dry humor guy. But I also accept my strength that I am an easy going, patience, and calm guy. I start to work from my weakness and did everything from http://orangepua.blogspot.sg/2012/08/be-your-self-to-extreme.html. Eventually, I get better at handling myself. For example, I have a dry humor up till now and when I say it, people will say I'am a retard. Now the me from before will be like depressed and "Fuck my humor is dry".. But now, I will still be confident about it... I will say whatever humor that I think is funny without think whether is it really funny. In the end, happiness is contagious. So if I laugh and happy with my own dry humor, people around me will laugh too.

Okay, the thing that I want to say is that, Be happy with what you have and work on your strength. You don't have to be jealous of what you don't have. Because we are unique and we have our own strength and weakness. That is why being yourself to the extreme is really really attractive. Heck, even being yourself itself is attractive. So don't try to be somebody that you are not to.

What Things that kills off Attraction

Hey guys, its been a long time since I write a blog. I had vacation and nothing happened with my love life. So yea, I've got no material to write. And damn, I missed writing all about this blog.

Anyway,
now that you guys know that how to spark attraction... Easy wasn't it? So now let's talk about what kills attraction. Surely you do not want to kill off what you had build. To avoid this, you just have to be aware of this.

Needy
Needy is actually the dumbest mistake average Joe will EVER make. Like EVER.... Needy comes from insecurity which means that you will think of needing that person. A great example of this is one-itis. It's a condition where you think that she/he is the only person in this Fucking Earth that you only wants.
Well one-itis itself is not bad, BUT extreme one-itis IS bad. 
A good example will be like

"Hey (girl) have u eaten your lunch?"
"(The girl doesn't give a fuck and not replying)"
"Hey why don't u reply to my text :) ?"
"(Again,, not a single fuck is given that day)"

Knowing his text is not being replied, he called the girl
"Uhh hi, I sent you a text but you didn't reply it... What are u doing right now?"
"CAN'T YOU SEE I'M BUSY RIGHT NOW!? AND I DON'T FEEL COMFORTABLE AT ALL"

After this he sent ANOTHER fucking text
"Uh sorry, I'm just worried about you.. I won't text you if you feel unhappy... Hope you always be happy :)"
And BOOM, congrats, he just enter a friendzone...

Anyway that's what needy behavior looks like... It kills a fucking attraction and irritates you like FUCK... So the next time you feel needy, go and do something else,,, play games, read comics, whatever as long as its not needy

Prize
Q : I want to give her a present!! Why Can't I do that?
A : Yes you can.. go ahead and give her
Q : But you said prize kills attraction?
A : Yes it kills, ONLY if you do it early and too often
Q : @_@

Okay, if you guys don't understand that, thats okay... Because me the nice will explain it again... Basically it's when you are seeing someone and you give a present TOO much and very often.
Why is it not good? Because to her it feels like you are buying their love with present. I personally used to do that when I was still a Fucking Chump... what I did to her was buy a present 1 month after we going out. Then buy another when she was about to go overseas. Then another after she return from oversea. Then another when she had a birthday. Then another when she pass her exam,,,, And so on..
You see, besides it is bad for your wallet, it is bad for your attraction too. She become less responsive from each present you gave and made her uncomfortable especially when you have not going out yet.

Non-leading
This apply to the boys only. If you are a girl and seeing somebody, just skip this part as girl was not made to LEAD... Boys, if you have not been leading, then you are in the deepest shit EVER... because you are not attractive to girl at all.
Girl ask "Where should we eat our lunch?"
Boy said " Up to you"
Girl ask " So what should we order?"
Boy said "Up to you"
Girl said "So where should we go after this?"
Boy said "Up to you"

Bear in mind UNLESS you are in a fucking television drama where the girl is madly fucking in love with you that it made you looks ultra cool and mysterious,,, it WILL NOT WORK IN THE REAL LIFE... In real life, the girl will slap you in the face and throw you to the fish pond... Well not like that but they will get ultra turn off. Not only you can't lead, you are a boring guy too. What challange and adventure she will get from you?? NONE

The next time girl ask you questions like that,, just answer it confidently. Girls prefer SO MUCH to eat in a restaurant that sell dog shit but it is the boy that chose it, rather than in restaurant that sell princess food but she has to choose it herself. Remember,, Boys are meant to LEAD..

How to Make Attraction?

Here, I will be talking on what triggers attraction. As I said earlier, attraction is very important.No attraction = friendzone. However, this will not work if you do not have the basic personality that I told in my previous post. So, make sure you have read my post "http://orangepua.blogspot.sg/2012/08/how-to-make-attraction-inner-game.html"

Attraction can be triggered by a lot of things. Be funny, goofy, and so forth will surely triggers attraction. However, not all people here can be funny. So here, be prepared for a technique that has been proven worked by me.

Stories
Like story telling, this means that you tell your partner stories. However, it is different that just your personal story or just her personal story. The story has to include between you and your partner. For example

"Do you like dog?"
"Yea, I love dog."
"Cool, so let's say we move to a new house together. What dog are we going to buy?"

See the difference? It creates a story that involving both of you. Rather than asking "What dog do you like?" which only tell about her story, you can create a story that makes her feel as if you are doing it together with her. Looks lame, but it works...

Challenge
This is my favorite's. Basically, cute girls are not used to being challenged most of the time.
Let say this conversation
"Hey (girl) do you like Spiderman?"
"NO, its lame... Barbie is better."
Now the average Joe here will be like "Yea you are right, spidey sucks, barbie rocks."... This kind of behavior is not attractive at all because, you are not a challenge for her. She can instantly change your mindset without any hard work. That is why "nice guy" will always stuck in a friendzone because of this very reason. The next time girl say something that you are not agree with, just challange her right away. Never ever be scared that she might angry or upset. Remember to value yourself, and do not ever put your partner on the pedestal.

Push/Pull
This is a classic method, yet very effective. I rarely used it personally. It is something you said that make her think you like her then push it away from her. Confusing in description, I will show the example.
"Hey, you look really smart, maybe you can teach me mathematics"
"Really? Sure I can teach you..."
"On a second thought, I want to be taught by a cute girl, so you fail to be my teacher"
Bear in mind, if you say this things in a very serious and straight face, then you are a jerk. This technique must be used in a playful manner. The reason I do not use this is because my personality is not really playful.

Too much pull will make you not attractive because it makes you looks needy. The same as with too much push. Too much push will make you look like jerk that does nothing but insulting. So remember, do it together and you will get girl licking your boots

Be Mysterious
Have you ever meet a person that display really little about themself? And that actually make you want to know more about them? The same applies to girl/boy. Mysterious and unpredictable is attractive because of the very same reasons. Unpredictable does not make you looks boring because they will never be able to guess what are you going to do or think.

This is very simple. Simply do not give all detail about yourself.
"Hey where are we going to eat?"
The easy way to be stupid and does not look mysterious is by telling her where are you going to eat.
So how to be mysterious and not predictable?
By not telling her where are you going. Simple as that, but do not do this to an extreme that she do not know anything about you. The point is, make her work to get what she want.

How to Make Attraction [Inner Game]

As stated, I'm not gonna be a dick and let you live in mystery of "HOW THE FUCK CAN I GET ATTRACTION?"

Out of all the love's elements, attraction is the easiest to make...
First of all, I want to let you all know that you DO NOT have to be funny... If you are a funny person to begin with, then that's good. It's a plus point for you. BUT, for those assholes that ARE NOT funny to begin with, DO NOT fake it... Girls can tell that you are being somebody else and give you a free ticket to "weirdo zone".


"SO WHAT SHOULD I DO THEN??"


Let's begin with the most basic. This is something that you should have inside yourself before going for the technique to make attraction. Without the foundation, technique will be meaningless.

Be Confidence
Easier said than done? Confidence will come to you if you are comfortable with yourself. "How do I get comfortable with myself?" Basically, you have to be yourself. I have explained this in the previous post. To get more information on "Be Yourself", visit my post http://orangepua.blogspot.sg/2012/08/be-your-self-to-extreme.html... However, for those lazy ass out there, I'll still be kind and give you a brief description. Basically, be proud of who you are and do not ever apologize for what you are. Do NOT think that you are weird. If you are a gamer, admit that you are a gamer and be proud of it. This will give you the boost of confidence and confidence itself is attractive. For girls, confidence is one of the top things that they look from men.

Vocal Projection

Pitch

"It is not WHAT you say, but HOW you say"... This quote explain everything. I can't give you example due to I'm not able to record my voice, but imagine that there are two condition happening to you. Lets say you are walking in the mall, and suddenly a super hot girl come to you and ask a question.
"Where is the starbucks?"
"Oh, its over there, and at the corner you turn left", with a high pitch voice.
The reason you are using high pitch voice is actually because you are trying to make her like you. But its actually counter-productive because, it set you in the lower value than her.

Now imagine stupid looking people with a non attractive face come to you and ask the same question. Probably your answer will be like
"Oh, its over there, and at the corner you turn left", but with a lower pitch voice.
The difference here is only the tonality of what you say.
You are using low pitch voice because you don't think anything of them. You don't hope them to like you and that is why you are using lower pitch voice.

Now some people might have naturally higher or naturally lower pitch voice. It does not really matter actually. What matter is when you raise your pitch, means you are lowering your value and it is NOT attractive to people. They will think you like a beggar

Pace
DO NOT talk in a very fast pace. The reason is because first it comes out as a low value, second people might not understand what you say. Let's break it one by one. Have you ever felt you are at the bottom of totem pole? And when you want to say something, you are scarred that your opinion might be cut from somebody that is on the higher totem pole? If yes, then that is normal. That's how the society works. Because of this, the lower value people will say everything they have in mind in one piece of sentence. Whereas, the higher value people will talk in slower pace because they know that they can take over the conversation however they want.

Second reason is people might not understand of what you say. And you will come across as nervous. When you are nervous, your brain will not be able to think properly. That is why people tend to have a lot to think when they are in bed because it is when their brain feel relaxed. So the next time you feel that people don't understand what you say, try to slow down. It helps you to think properly and comes out as a high value person. Remember, human like human that has higher social status.

Volume
I can't stress this enough, for heaven's sake, SPEAK LOUDER. The more people that surround yourself, the more you have to speak louder. First, because you want everybody to be able to hear what you say. If you are talking to a girl and there are A LOT of people around you, you want to speak louder. It allows other people to hear what you say to the girl and the girl will feel safe, because she knew that you are not doing anything bad to her. If you speak very soft, then she might think that you are not confident or you are planning something bad to her, like rapping.

Second reason, obviously you want her to hear what you said. If she can hear you properly, she will thinks you are confident. You speak of what you feel, without caring of what other people might think of you. And that is the most attractive traits a man can have.

Passion
Let's say you are in a class, and your teacher speak in monotone voice. What do you think of that? BORING AND SLEEPY!!
The same will happens to people that you talk to. When you speak, speak with passion. And that is why its important to speak something that you like. If you like video game, then there is nothing wrong to talk about it to girls. However, do not keep blabbering about how good you are in video game. Give her chance to talk about something too. The more things that you let her talk, the better conversationalist she will think of you.

Why Attraction is Important?

Have you ever had a crush and when you confess to them, they will say "Thanks you are a nice guy, but I don't want to ruin our relationship... So let's just stay as what we are.." or "I think of you like brother"??

If you had, then you just get rejected, indirectly... The true meaning behind those words is "You are a nice guy but I just don't feel any attraction towards you"

So what happened here is you lack of attraction to attract your "future partner". You and your partner might always share problem, thoughts and so on with each other. But after all that, you thought she loves you back, you confess to her... "I...Love you, do you want to be my girlfriend?"... Then she replied like the quote at the beginning of paragraph...

To answer the question of the tittle, attraction is important because it is like a magnet. It makes the person feel want to be with you, not just mentally but also physically... Without attraction, you guys will just be friends forever. Well, best friends at Max, not gonna be more than that. The next time you want to get somebody to love you, remember that you have to attract them to like you first... To put it simply, without attraction, you will be putting yourself into the "Friendzone" because she will think "Ohh he is such a nice guy, he always be there when I need him... So if he become my boyfriend and we end up break up, it's going to be awkward. So... let's just put him in the friendzone, just in case I need someone to talk to, he will be there".... That's life bro.... 

Think about it like this, will you be interested to go out with a dull boring guy? Let's say you wanna hang out to a mall, with your friend. He is super boring and can't do a shit. He talks really soft, insecure, and apologize every single minute... Will you even be interested to get to know anything about his life?
HECK NO!! He is so boring he can just fuck himself...

Will you want to go out with them again? HECK NO!! I'd rather FAP than going out with people like that. So get the point now? Without Attraction, they won't spend time with you, or even interested to get to know you. That's why attraction is really an important elements in dating.

In terms of Picking Up, without attraction then she will not interested to get to know you.
For example,
"What's your hobby?"
"Sleep"
"Tell me something special about yourself"
"Nothing special"
See, that's what you will get if you try to have a conversation without attraction. In other words, attraction is like something that you must have before going to rapport or comfort.