How to make Comfort?!

Now that you know what is comfort, I'm sure that you know or at least have a bit understanding of how to create it... Well it does not matter whether you do or you don't. Because I'm about to tell you anyway. So in the previous post, I told you about how important it is to have a comfort. Because without it, you will be like a television. Fun but useless.

Here are some way to make a comfort

Genuine Communication

Remember that I told you that girls can sense whether you are faking or not? If you are faking, you will be labelled as a weirdo because she knew that you are insecure. Why would you even faking if you are comfortable with yourself? Anyway the same goes with communication. If you ask or tell something that you are not genuinely interested in, she will know it immediately. 

Let's take an example of this, you like Spiderman, and you want to know whether she likes spiderman too. But you scared that she might "brands" you as a weirdo or a kid. So instead, you ask something that makes you look like an adult. Such as "What course are you studying?"....

And when you get the answer, you will be like "Ohhh.. ok" and change to another topic. "What is your favorite food?"... 
And she give you the answer again and you will be like "ok" again. 
And change it to another topic again and so on until she get pissed off and tell you to fuck off.

It might looks simple and not important, but genuine communication is really really a way to build a comfort. So that is why, ALWAYS ASK A QUESTION THAT YOU ARE GENUINELY WANT TO KNOW. It makes her feel like you really want to know her and therefore it creates a bond between the two of you.

Dig in the same hole

Ok, fuck you, do not think this is like "that" hole!!! What I meant by this is try to get to know her deeper by deep communication. And it is REALLY important. 

Here's example number one

"So what do you do for fun?"

"Fishing"

"Ok, cool. So what is your course study?"

"Arts"

"Alright, what is your favorite bread?"

"Bread Talk"

And here's example number two

"So what do you do for fun?"

"Fishing"

"Ok, tell me, is that your hobby or out of boredom"?

"Well it's kinda like my hobby"

"Great, since when do you fishing?"

"Since I was a baby"

"Cool, you must be an aquatic baby LOL"

Okay forget the aquatic baby part, I don't even know what the hell is that. But do you get the differences between the first and the second example? 

The first example is simply just shooting her with a lot of nonsense conversation, and it does not have any point at all. You know a bunch of layer deep information about her. So What??! It does not make you know anything from her. 

The second example, on the other hand ask a root deep question. And by doing this, it creates a subconscious mind inside her that said "Hmm, this guy understands me". Therefore you get a bond with her and therefore she will feel comfortable with you.

So the next time you talk to a person, don't just shoot them with tons of random questions. Instead elaborate their statements and ask from there.

In conclusion, the two on top are about the same. But you can't do a deep communication without genuine communication. If you are not interested in what you are talking about, how can you think of elaborating it... That is why always ask a genuine question and deepen it by deeper communication

What is Comfort?!

The question is, "Is attraction alone enough?" Have you ever think about this question? Some of you might think it is enough, some of you might think it is not. Well to me, the answer is NO...

First of all, let's talk about what is comfort. Have you ever felt like "Ohh this person understands me" or "I felt like I can talk anything to this person"... If you do, then that is comfort. Basically, it is a feeling of comfortable (DUHHH..) of being with somebody...

If you have a friend, and you felt like you can talk about anything to your friend, it means that you are comfortable with them. It does not matter, whether your friend is a guy or a girl. The point is, if you are able to talk or share anything with them, that is Comfort.

Without comfort, you are just like a clown, dancing around just for the sake of entertaining people. Let's take an example of this. You are going to some random mall, and you met a clown. He is able to make you laugh, get your attention, and you are just happy for that day. Get it? Now what do you think of that? Most of you, will think like "Ohh what a nice clown he is"... But, will you want to go out with him? Probably NO... Why? Because even though he is attractive, there is no point in going out with him BECAUSE he does not know anything about you. Will you share your problem with him? Heck NO, you just met him...

To sum it up, without comfort, you will be the dancing monkey because you will just be there to entertain her. You won't be able to going out with her because she does not know you. In other word, you are Fucked... Therefore, I'm here to teach you how to create a comfort between the both of you in my next post

Brain Fart

Today, I want to talk more on inner game and it's as important as any others... It's called BRAIN FARTS. Brain fart is a process where your brain giving off a stinky gases and its chemical formula is H32P9...

LOL I'm just kidding.

Brain fart is often used by anybody including me. It's something like "Ummm..."

Get it?
No?
Okay me the generous will give you more example

"Yo... what book did you read yesterday?"
"Ummm... it's called Garfield book"
"I see, is it fun?"
"Ummm. yea, its really funny"
"So how was the story?"
"It's when a human named Garfield get kicked in the ass by uhhh.. Warfield and bla bla bla"

What is your impression against the guy that "Ummm.." a lot?
Get it now?

It's when people say the word "Ummm.." a lot. To girls, it shows that you are not confident. I have tried it several times and when you Brain Farts a lot, girl will just suddenly leave you. It's like they can sense it automatically and yes, it kills attraction. Simple but deadly.

So the next time you guys are going to "Ummm.." hold it, and better speaks nothing. At first it might be hard for you and you have to do it consciously. But overtime, you will get used to it and you can see the result right away.

I know I know, easier said than done. But I don't have any way to make you lost you brain farts. Keep practicing to everyone around you.

What Things that kills off Attraction

Hey guys, its been a long time since I write a blog. I had vacation and nothing happened with my love life. So yea, I've got no material to write. And damn, I missed writing all about this blog.

Anyway,
now that you guys know that how to spark attraction... Easy wasn't it? So now let's talk about what kills attraction. Surely you do not want to kill off what you had build. To avoid this, you just have to be aware of this.

Needy
Needy is actually the dumbest mistake average Joe will EVER make. Like EVER.... Needy comes from insecurity which means that you will think of needing that person. A great example of this is one-itis. It's a condition where you think that she/he is the only person in this Fucking Earth that you only wants.
Well one-itis itself is not bad, BUT extreme one-itis IS bad. 
A good example will be like

"Hey (girl) have u eaten your lunch?"
"(The girl doesn't give a fuck and not replying)"
"Hey why don't u reply to my text :) ?"
"(Again,, not a single fuck is given that day)"

Knowing his text is not being replied, he called the girl
"Uhh hi, I sent you a text but you didn't reply it... What are u doing right now?"
"CAN'T YOU SEE I'M BUSY RIGHT NOW!? AND I DON'T FEEL COMFORTABLE AT ALL"

After this he sent ANOTHER fucking text
"Uh sorry, I'm just worried about you.. I won't text you if you feel unhappy... Hope you always be happy :)"
And BOOM, congrats, he just enter a friendzone...

Anyway that's what needy behavior looks like... It kills a fucking attraction and irritates you like FUCK... So the next time you feel needy, go and do something else,,, play games, read comics, whatever as long as its not needy

Prize
Q : I want to give her a present!! Why Can't I do that?
A : Yes you can.. go ahead and give her
Q : But you said prize kills attraction?
A : Yes it kills, ONLY if you do it early and too often
Q : @_@

Okay, if you guys don't understand that, thats okay... Because me the nice will explain it again... Basically it's when you are seeing someone and you give a present TOO much and very often.
Why is it not good? Because to her it feels like you are buying their love with present. I personally used to do that when I was still a Fucking Chump... what I did to her was buy a present 1 month after we going out. Then buy another when she was about to go overseas. Then another after she return from oversea. Then another when she had a birthday. Then another when she pass her exam,,,, And so on..
You see, besides it is bad for your wallet, it is bad for your attraction too. She become less responsive from each present you gave and made her uncomfortable especially when you have not going out yet.

Non-leading
This apply to the boys only. If you are a girl and seeing somebody, just skip this part as girl was not made to LEAD... Boys, if you have not been leading, then you are in the deepest shit EVER... because you are not attractive to girl at all.
Girl ask "Where should we eat our lunch?"
Boy said " Up to you"
Girl ask " So what should we order?"
Boy said "Up to you"
Girl said "So where should we go after this?"
Boy said "Up to you"

Bear in mind UNLESS you are in a fucking television drama where the girl is madly fucking in love with you that it made you looks ultra cool and mysterious,,, it WILL NOT WORK IN THE REAL LIFE... In real life, the girl will slap you in the face and throw you to the fish pond... Well not like that but they will get ultra turn off. Not only you can't lead, you are a boring guy too. What challange and adventure she will get from you?? NONE

The next time girl ask you questions like that,, just answer it confidently. Girls prefer SO MUCH to eat in a restaurant that sell dog shit but it is the boy that chose it, rather than in restaurant that sell princess food but she has to choose it herself. Remember,, Boys are meant to LEAD..

How to Make Attraction?

Here, I will be talking on what triggers attraction. As I said earlier, attraction is very important.No attraction = friendzone. However, this will not work if you do not have the basic personality that I told in my previous post. So, make sure you have read my post "http://orangepua.blogspot.sg/2012/08/how-to-make-attraction-inner-game.html"

Attraction can be triggered by a lot of things. Be funny, goofy, and so forth will surely triggers attraction. However, not all people here can be funny. So here, be prepared for a technique that has been proven worked by me.

Stories
Like story telling, this means that you tell your partner stories. However, it is different that just your personal story or just her personal story. The story has to include between you and your partner. For example

"Do you like dog?"
"Yea, I love dog."
"Cool, so let's say we move to a new house together. What dog are we going to buy?"

See the difference? It creates a story that involving both of you. Rather than asking "What dog do you like?" which only tell about her story, you can create a story that makes her feel as if you are doing it together with her. Looks lame, but it works...

Challenge
This is my favorite's. Basically, cute girls are not used to being challenged most of the time.
Let say this conversation
"Hey (girl) do you like Spiderman?"
"NO, its lame... Barbie is better."
Now the average Joe here will be like "Yea you are right, spidey sucks, barbie rocks."... This kind of behavior is not attractive at all because, you are not a challenge for her. She can instantly change your mindset without any hard work. That is why "nice guy" will always stuck in a friendzone because of this very reason. The next time girl say something that you are not agree with, just challange her right away. Never ever be scared that she might angry or upset. Remember to value yourself, and do not ever put your partner on the pedestal.

Push/Pull
This is a classic method, yet very effective. I rarely used it personally. It is something you said that make her think you like her then push it away from her. Confusing in description, I will show the example.
"Hey, you look really smart, maybe you can teach me mathematics"
"Really? Sure I can teach you..."
"On a second thought, I want to be taught by a cute girl, so you fail to be my teacher"
Bear in mind, if you say this things in a very serious and straight face, then you are a jerk. This technique must be used in a playful manner. The reason I do not use this is because my personality is not really playful.

Too much pull will make you not attractive because it makes you looks needy. The same as with too much push. Too much push will make you look like jerk that does nothing but insulting. So remember, do it together and you will get girl licking your boots

Be Mysterious
Have you ever meet a person that display really little about themself? And that actually make you want to know more about them? The same applies to girl/boy. Mysterious and unpredictable is attractive because of the very same reasons. Unpredictable does not make you looks boring because they will never be able to guess what are you going to do or think.

This is very simple. Simply do not give all detail about yourself.
"Hey where are we going to eat?"
The easy way to be stupid and does not look mysterious is by telling her where are you going to eat.
So how to be mysterious and not predictable?
By not telling her where are you going. Simple as that, but do not do this to an extreme that she do not know anything about you. The point is, make her work to get what she want.

How to Make Attraction [Inner Game]

As stated, I'm not gonna be a dick and let you live in mystery of "HOW THE FUCK CAN I GET ATTRACTION?"

Out of all the love's elements, attraction is the easiest to make...
First of all, I want to let you all know that you DO NOT have to be funny... If you are a funny person to begin with, then that's good. It's a plus point for you. BUT, for those assholes that ARE NOT funny to begin with, DO NOT fake it... Girls can tell that you are being somebody else and give you a free ticket to "weirdo zone".


"SO WHAT SHOULD I DO THEN??"


Let's begin with the most basic. This is something that you should have inside yourself before going for the technique to make attraction. Without the foundation, technique will be meaningless.

Be Confidence
Easier said than done? Confidence will come to you if you are comfortable with yourself. "How do I get comfortable with myself?" Basically, you have to be yourself. I have explained this in the previous post. To get more information on "Be Yourself", visit my post http://orangepua.blogspot.sg/2012/08/be-your-self-to-extreme.html... However, for those lazy ass out there, I'll still be kind and give you a brief description. Basically, be proud of who you are and do not ever apologize for what you are. Do NOT think that you are weird. If you are a gamer, admit that you are a gamer and be proud of it. This will give you the boost of confidence and confidence itself is attractive. For girls, confidence is one of the top things that they look from men.

Vocal Projection

Pitch

"It is not WHAT you say, but HOW you say"... This quote explain everything. I can't give you example due to I'm not able to record my voice, but imagine that there are two condition happening to you. Lets say you are walking in the mall, and suddenly a super hot girl come to you and ask a question.
"Where is the starbucks?"
"Oh, its over there, and at the corner you turn left", with a high pitch voice.
The reason you are using high pitch voice is actually because you are trying to make her like you. But its actually counter-productive because, it set you in the lower value than her.

Now imagine stupid looking people with a non attractive face come to you and ask the same question. Probably your answer will be like
"Oh, its over there, and at the corner you turn left", but with a lower pitch voice.
The difference here is only the tonality of what you say.
You are using low pitch voice because you don't think anything of them. You don't hope them to like you and that is why you are using lower pitch voice.

Now some people might have naturally higher or naturally lower pitch voice. It does not really matter actually. What matter is when you raise your pitch, means you are lowering your value and it is NOT attractive to people. They will think you like a beggar

Pace
DO NOT talk in a very fast pace. The reason is because first it comes out as a low value, second people might not understand what you say. Let's break it one by one. Have you ever felt you are at the bottom of totem pole? And when you want to say something, you are scarred that your opinion might be cut from somebody that is on the higher totem pole? If yes, then that is normal. That's how the society works. Because of this, the lower value people will say everything they have in mind in one piece of sentence. Whereas, the higher value people will talk in slower pace because they know that they can take over the conversation however they want.

Second reason is people might not understand of what you say. And you will come across as nervous. When you are nervous, your brain will not be able to think properly. That is why people tend to have a lot to think when they are in bed because it is when their brain feel relaxed. So the next time you feel that people don't understand what you say, try to slow down. It helps you to think properly and comes out as a high value person. Remember, human like human that has higher social status.

Volume
I can't stress this enough, for heaven's sake, SPEAK LOUDER. The more people that surround yourself, the more you have to speak louder. First, because you want everybody to be able to hear what you say. If you are talking to a girl and there are A LOT of people around you, you want to speak louder. It allows other people to hear what you say to the girl and the girl will feel safe, because she knew that you are not doing anything bad to her. If you speak very soft, then she might think that you are not confident or you are planning something bad to her, like rapping.

Second reason, obviously you want her to hear what you said. If she can hear you properly, she will thinks you are confident. You speak of what you feel, without caring of what other people might think of you. And that is the most attractive traits a man can have.

Passion
Let's say you are in a class, and your teacher speak in monotone voice. What do you think of that? BORING AND SLEEPY!!
The same will happens to people that you talk to. When you speak, speak with passion. And that is why its important to speak something that you like. If you like video game, then there is nothing wrong to talk about it to girls. However, do not keep blabbering about how good you are in video game. Give her chance to talk about something too. The more things that you let her talk, the better conversationalist she will think of you.

Why Attraction is Important?

Have you ever had a crush and when you confess to them, they will say "Thanks you are a nice guy, but I don't want to ruin our relationship... So let's just stay as what we are.." or "I think of you like brother"??

If you had, then you just get rejected, indirectly... The true meaning behind those words is "You are a nice guy but I just don't feel any attraction towards you"

So what happened here is you lack of attraction to attract your "future partner". You and your partner might always share problem, thoughts and so on with each other. But after all that, you thought she loves you back, you confess to her... "I...Love you, do you want to be my girlfriend?"... Then she replied like the quote at the beginning of paragraph...

To answer the question of the tittle, attraction is important because it is like a magnet. It makes the person feel want to be with you, not just mentally but also physically... Without attraction, you guys will just be friends forever. Well, best friends at Max, not gonna be more than that. The next time you want to get somebody to love you, remember that you have to attract them to like you first... To put it simply, without attraction, you will be putting yourself into the "Friendzone" because she will think "Ohh he is such a nice guy, he always be there when I need him... So if he become my boyfriend and we end up break up, it's going to be awkward. So... let's just put him in the friendzone, just in case I need someone to talk to, he will be there".... That's life bro.... 

Think about it like this, will you be interested to go out with a dull boring guy? Let's say you wanna hang out to a mall, with your friend. He is super boring and can't do a shit. He talks really soft, insecure, and apologize every single minute... Will you even be interested to get to know anything about his life?
HECK NO!! He is so boring he can just fuck himself...

Will you want to go out with them again? HECK NO!! I'd rather FAP than going out with people like that. So get the point now? Without Attraction, they won't spend time with you, or even interested to get to know you. That's why attraction is really an important elements in dating.

In terms of Picking Up, without attraction then she will not interested to get to know you.
For example,
"What's your hobby?"
"Sleep"
"Tell me something special about yourself"
"Nothing special"
See, that's what you will get if you try to have a conversation without attraction. In other words, attraction is like something that you must have before going to rapport or comfort.